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Missionary :  How to make it good for her, because 95% of you are BORING and AWFUL at it
9:43

Missionary : How to make it good for her, because 95% of you are BORING and AWFUL at it

Schahrzad Morgan

5 chapters7 takeaways9 key terms5 questions

Overview

This video explains how to improve the missionary position by focusing on the man's ability to stay connected and sensual with his partner, rather than making it a purely physical act. It emphasizes the importance of the man supporting his own weight using a plank-like posture, allowing for varied hip movements while maintaining eye contact or close physical contact with his partner's face or neck. The core message is that by focusing on connection and control, men can transform a potentially boring experience into an intimate and enjoyable one for both partners, avoiding the common pitfall of disengagement and mindless thrusting.

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Chapters

  • Many men make the missionary position boring by focusing only on their own physical release.
  • Lack of connection leaves the woman feeling disconnected and objectified, often just enduring the act.
  • The goal should be to create an experience so pleasurable that the woman wants it to continue, not just end quickly.
  • This requires the man to actively engage and support his weight to remain connected.
Understanding why the missionary position often fails is the first step to improving it, highlighting the need for a partner-centered approach.
The woman is left looking at the ceiling while the man mindlessly humps her, thinking only about his own release.
  • The key to a better missionary position is the man's ability to support his own upper body weight.
  • This requires practicing a plank-like position, ideally for 5-10 minutes, to build core strength and endurance.
  • To build strength, practice with feet elevated or on knees, focusing on tucking the pelvis to engage the core.
  • This physical preparation allows for sustained connection and varied movements without rocking or collapsing.
Developing the physical capacity to hold a stable upper body is essential for maintaining intimacy and control during intercourse.
Practicing a plank with feet up or on knees, tucking the pelvis to strengthen the core, to build the endurance needed to support oneself during the act.
  • The most crucial element is maintaining connection with the partner's face, ideally through eye contact or by nestling the face near hers.
  • The man's upper body should remain stable, not rocking, while his pelvis performs the movements.
  • Avoid disconnecting by burying your head in the pillow; instead, keep your face engaged with her face, neck, or shoulder.
  • This sustained physical and visual connection fosters intimacy and makes the experience more pleasurable for the woman.
Prioritizing face-to-face or close facial contact transforms the act from a mechanical one into an intimate exchange.
Instead of burying his head in the pillow, the man keeps his face near his partner's, looking into her eyes, kissing her forehead, or nestling his face in her neck.
  • Once stable, the man can introduce varied hip movements: slow in-and-out, side-to-side, and circular motions.
  • Varying the tempo of the in-and-out motion, like a slow cat-cow, can increase pleasure without rushing to climax.
  • Side-to-side and circular movements add different sensations and maintain engagement.
  • All these movements should be controlled by the pelvis, with the upper body remaining steady and connected.
Introducing variety in movement prevents monotony and allows for exploration of different sensations, deepening the shared experience.
Performing slow, deliberate in-and-out hip movements for several seconds, followed by gentle side-to-side or circular motions, all while maintaining eye contact or facial proximity.
  • From the woman's perspective, seeing her partner's face and feeling his connection is paramount.
  • When the man is engaged, his affection and arousal are visible, creating a shared intimate moment.
  • Disconnection, marked by the man's head being out of view or buried in the pillow, shifts the woman's focus to the ceiling and the monotony of the act.
  • The goal is to ensure the woman feels seen, desired, and connected throughout the entire experience.
Understanding the woman's sensory and emotional experience is crucial for creating mutual pleasure and satisfaction.
The contrast between seeing the partner's affectionate face and kisses versus looking at the ceiling while the partner is disengaged and 'pounding away'.

Key takeaways

  1. 1The missionary position's success hinges on the man's ability to maintain connection and control, not just physical exertion.
  2. 2Core strength and upper body stability are foundational for performing varied, sensual movements.
  3. 3Sustained eye contact or close facial proximity is vital for intimacy and preventing the partner from feeling disconnected.
  4. 4Varying hip movements (in-and-out, side-to-side, circles) with controlled tempo enhances pleasure.
  5. 5The man's engagement transforms the experience from mechanical to intimate for the woman.
  6. 6Focusing on the partner's pleasure and connection ensures a more satisfying encounter for both.
  7. 7Avoid mindlessly thrusting; prioritize deliberate, connected movements.

Key terms

Missionary positionPartner connectionCore strengthPlank positionPelvic mobilitySensual movementEye contactIntimacyTempo variation

Test your understanding

  1. 1What is the primary reason the missionary position is often considered boring, according to the video?
  2. 2How does a man's core strength contribute to a better missionary experience for his partner?
  3. 3What specific actions can a man take to maintain connection with his partner's face during the missionary position?
  4. 4Describe three types of hip movements that can enhance the missionary position, and why is upper body stability important during these movements?
  5. 5Why is it crucial for a man to understand his partner's perspective regarding connection and engagement during intercourse?

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