1:06:06
Cut Him Off - He’ll CHASE & Commit To ONLY You! By former single mom x4
Mia Adora🌹💍Feminine Energy
Overview
This video discusses the strategy of 'cutting off' a man in dating to encourage commitment and chase. The speakers, a couple who have coached many women, explain the psychological reasons behind this approach from both male and female perspectives. They emphasize that women often give too much too soon, leading men to feel no urgency to commit. The core message is that by creating space and demonstrating self-worth, women can activate a man's masculine desire to pursue and commit. The video also touches on nervous system patterns, healing from past trauma, and the importance of a woman's own timeline and clarity in relationships.
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Chapters
- Cutting off a man, or detaching, is a strategy to encourage his pursuit and commitment.
- This approach works by creating a sense of urgency and making him realize what he might lose.
- It shifts the dynamic from the woman being overly available to the man actively pursuing her.
- This is presented as a way to activate masculine chase and leadership in dating and marriage.
Understanding when and how to create distance is crucial for shifting relationship dynamics and encouraging a partner's commitment, rather than settling for a situationship.
The speaker, Tash, describes how she 'cut off' Coach B, which prompted him to chase and commit to her.
- Men typically know within the first 30-90 days if a woman is someone they could marry.
- By 3-6 months, if there's no clear direction towards commitment or marriage, it's a sign to re-evaluate.
- A key indicator is a lack of improved consistency or follow-through from the man over time.
- Women should not cut men off arbitrarily but look for healthy signs; if those signs are absent, then cutting off is necessary.
Establishing clear timelines and recognizing consistent behavior (or lack thereof) helps women avoid wasting time in relationships that lack future potential.
If a man consistently makes promises but his follow-through doesn't improve by the 3-6 month mark, it's a signal to detach.
- Being overly patient, giving, and available (the 'nice girl' pattern) can paradoxically deter commitment.
- Men are drawn to a challenge and a sense of urgency; if they have full access and receive 'wife treatment' without commitment, there's no incentive to escalate.
- This behavior often stems from childhood nervous system programming related to inconsistent love.
- A man's attraction is driven by how he feels with a woman and the challenge of accessing her, not just her availability.
Understanding how masculine energy responds to availability versus challenge is key to not inadvertently pushing potential partners away by giving too much too soon.
Giving a man 'everything that a man who desires to be with a wife' receives, without him committing, removes the incentive for him to marry you because he already has the benefits.
- Our nervous systems can become programmed to associate inconsistent behavior with love and chemistry.
- When a man 'breadcrumbs' or is inconsistent, a woman's nervous system might register this as exciting or loving, even if logically she knows it's not good.
- This attachment to inconsistent love is often rooted in past trauma or unhealed wounds.
- Reprogramming these nervous system patterns is essential for attracting a man who offers consistent commitment.
Recognizing that emotional attachment can be a nervous system response, rather than pure logic, is vital for breaking cycles of attracting unavailable partners.
Feeling a rush of love or chemistry when an inconsistent man texts after a period of silence, despite knowing logically he's not good for you.
- True 'cutting off' means moving on with your life, not just taking a break or counting days.
- It involves detaching emotionally and not holding onto hope for his return or change.
- Women often struggle to cut ties due to invested time, fear of loss, or the desire to 'get the reward' for their patience.
- Men categorize women early on; if they don't see marriage potential, their behavior will reflect that, and waiting won't change their categorization.
Completely detaching and moving forward is necessary to open yourself up to a partner who is ready for commitment, rather than remaining stuck in a prolonged situationship.
A woman counting '12 days and 5 hours' since she last spoke to him is not truly cutting him off; she's just taking a break.
- Men may not state they aren't ready to avoid losing the woman, hoping they can 'get ready' while still with her.
- If a man is getting everything he wants (companionship, intimacy) without commitment, there's no reason for him to 'mess up a good thing' by being honest about his lack of readiness.
- Women must identify signs of a man's intentions through his actions, not just his words.
- When a man is sexually involved, he is less likely to end the relationship unless the woman creates that boundary.
Understanding men's motivations for not being direct about their intentions helps women avoid waiting for something that may never materialize.
A man tells a woman he's not ready for marriage but continues the relationship because he's receiving all the benefits of a committed partner without the commitment itself.
- Attracting a high-value man requires the woman to be in an awakened, high-value feminine energy state.
- Settling for 'breadcrumbs' often indicates unhealed trauma or a nervous system hungry for validation.
- Behavioral change (like detaching) must precede the feeling of readiness; the feeling follows the action.
- Women need to 'skill up' with strategy and inner work, not just consume more information, to attract the right partner.
Prioritizing personal healing and self-worth is the foundation for attracting a healthy, committed relationship, rather than seeking external validation.
Implementing behavioral changes like detaching from an unavailable man before feeling emotionally ready, knowing that the positive feelings will follow.
- In co-parenting, it's crucial to separate personal love life from parental responsibilities.
- Using children as a means to maintain access to an ex-partner is detrimental and won't foster commitment.
- Interactions with a co-parent should be strictly platonic and focused on logistics, like a co-worker.
- Women must pull their energy away from the ex-partner as a source of happiness and focus on their own healing.
Maintaining clear boundaries in co-parenting is essential for both the woman's emotional well-being and the children's stability, while also protecting her own dating future.
Communicating with a co-parent only about necessary arrangements for the children, without engaging in personal conversations or seeking emotional connection.
Key takeaways
- True commitment from a man is often unlocked when a woman creates space and demonstrates her value by not being overly available.
- Men's actions, not just their words, reveal their true intentions regarding commitment and marriage.
- A woman's own healing and nervous system regulation are paramount to attracting a healthy, committed partner.
- Avoid giving 'wife treatment' or excessive access to a man before he has committed to marriage.
- Don't use children as a means to maintain contact or emotional access to an ex-partner.
- Focus on your own timeline and healing journey; don't wait indefinitely for a man to 'get ready'.
- Financial entanglement with a man before marriage, especially giving him money, is a significant red flag and can prolong unhealthy situations.
Key terms
Cutting him offDetachingMasculine chaseFeminine energySituationshipNervous system patternsBreadcrumbsProvider energyPolarityRotational dating
Test your understanding
- Why does 'cutting him off' encourage a man to commit, and what are the underlying psychological principles?
- What are the key indicators within the first 3-6 months of dating that suggest a lack of commitment from a man?
- How can a woman's 'nice girl' tendencies, like being overly patient, inadvertently hinder a man's desire to commit?
- What is the role of nervous system patterns in attracting and staying in relationships with inconsistent partners?
- When co-parenting, how can a woman maintain necessary communication with an ex-partner while still effectively 'cutting him off' from her personal life?