27:15
Woman REVEALS the signs you are an attractive select man and choosing signals @RomeoRoadmap
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Overview
This video explores the concept of a "select man" from a woman's perspective, focusing on the subtle and overt signals that indicate a man's attractiveness and desirability. It contrasts genuine confidence and attractiveness with performative behaviors like peacocking and competition among men. The discussion highlights how women naturally gravitate towards men who possess a certain aura, confidence, and social intelligence, and how other men may react with envy or attempts to sabotage. The video also touches on the mental shift required for men who are leveling up and becoming more desirable, emphasizing the importance of internal validation over external validation, especially from other men.
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Chapters
- Some men engage in direct competition or subtly sabotage other men, especially when women are present, contradicting the idea of a strong "bro code."
- This behavior often stems from insecurity and a need for attention, manifesting as peacocking or trying to undermine others.
- Men who are overly "woman-fixated" may prioritize gaining a woman's attention over loyalty to friends, even lying about their relationships to seem more available.
- This competitive dynamic is often driven by a desire to "stick it" to another man rather than genuine interest in the woman.
Understanding this competitive behavior helps identify men who lack genuine confidence and are driven by external validation, which can be a red flag in social interactions.
A frat brother intervening in a conversation at a bar to undermine his friend, telling the woman the other guy is the type to send a message now that he has her attention, simply to gain attention himself.
- Peacocking, such as flashy displays of money (e.g., a "money spread"), is a performative attempt to attract women that often backfires.
- This behavior can attract women who are also attracted to superficial displays, leading to relationships based on material value rather than character.
- Genuine "select" men don't need to overtly flaunt; their attractiveness is often perceived naturally.
- Men who engage in excessive peacocking often lack substance and are essentially "salesmen" trying to convince others of their worth.
Distinguishing between genuine confidence and performative peacocking is crucial for understanding how attraction is truly built and for avoiding superficial connections.
A man doing a "money spread" in front of women at a bar, which is seen as cringe-worthy and indicative of a lack of genuine substance, attracting a certain type of woman but not demonstrating true desirability.
- Women naturally gravitate towards men who exude a "select" aura, often seeking proximity to them.
- Subtle signals, like prolonged eye contact, smiling, or initiating a simple conversation, are ways women express interest.
- For more oblivious men, consistent eye contact and smiling across a room can be clear indicators of interest.
- Women are often looking for men who are confident enough to approach or respond to their signals, rather than those who overthink or self-sabotage due to fear of rejection.
This chapter explains how women signal interest and how men can better interpret these signals, emphasizing the importance of confidence in acting upon perceived attraction.
A woman standing near a man at a networking event, saying hello with a smile, as a subtle way to open a conversation and signal approachability and interest.
- The "looks maxing" community is criticized for being overly focused on male-to-male validation and arguments about attractiveness, rather than understanding real-world female choice.
- Men in this community often evaluate each other more intensely than women do, creating a "sausage fest" of debate.
- A "select" man should be concerned with a woman's perception of him, not the opinions of other men.
- Real-world female choice often contradicts the rigid hierarchies discussed in some online communities.
This section challenges the validity of certain online dating advice communities, urging men to focus on genuine female attraction rather than peer validation from other men.
Men in online forums arguing intensely about who "mogs" whom (who is more attractive), which the speaker finds "sus" and indicative of a lack of focus on actual female attraction.
- Men may try to orbit or stay in proximity to a "select" man to absorb some of his perceived positive aura or success with women.
- These men might also try to sabotage the "select" man's aura by speaking negatively about him or interfering in his interactions.
- Some men will actively try to "cockblock" or undermine a friend's interactions with women, even lying about their relationship to seem more available.
- This behavior is often driven by envy and a desire to prevent others from succeeding where they feel they are failing.
Recognizing the tendency for some men to orbit or sabotage others highlights the competitive and sometimes disloyal nature that can exist, even among friends, when attraction is involved.
A man's "wing girl" informing him that his friends are talking negatively about him and trying to interfere in his interactions with women, even going into the women's inboxes to discredit him.
- Achieving a "level up" in attractiveness and desirability requires a significant mental shift, not just physical changes.
- Not everyone, including friends and family, will celebrate this evolution; some may react with envy or skepticism.
- A "select" man must be mentally strong to navigate the animosity and projections that come with increased visibility.
- The transition from being invisible to undeniably visible brings new challenges and requires learning to operate with newfound power without arrogance.
This chapter emphasizes that becoming a "select" man is an internal journey that requires mental fortitude to handle the social and emotional consequences of personal growth.
A man going from being the guy who never brings a date to Thanksgiving to bringing an attractive partner, only to be met with "cockeyed" looks from family members instead of celebration.
- Men who fake being "select" often do so through loud behavior and peacocking, trying to convince others rather than embodying the traits naturally.
- Genuine "select" men don't need to announce their status; their presence and actions speak for themselves.
- These "salesmen" or "snake oil salesmen" try to sell their image, often reporting their successes to other men.
- A key sign of not being "select" is the need to constantly report achievements or seek validation, especially from other men.
Understanding the difference between genuine confidence and performative "salesmanship" helps in identifying authentic attractiveness versus superficial posturing.
A man constantly telling other men about the women he's attracted or "pulled," trying to impress them with his perceived success, which indicates he is not genuinely select and is seeking external validation.
Key takeaways
- Genuine attractiveness in men is often perceived through subtle confidence and social intelligence, not overt displays or competition.
- Men who engage in peacocking or constant competition often lack true self-assurance and are seeking external validation.
- Women naturally gravitate towards men who exude a positive aura, and they use subtle signals to express interest.
- It's crucial for men to focus on attracting women based on their own perceived value, rather than seeking approval from other men.
- The journey to becoming a "select" man involves significant mental and emotional growth, including the ability to handle envy and projections from others.
- Authentic confidence is quiet and self-assured; it doesn't require constant self-promotion or comparison with others.
- Understanding women's signals and responding with confidence is key to successful dating interactions.
- The "bro code" is often disregarded when men are competing for female attention, leading to sabotage and envy.
Key terms
Select manPeacockingCompetitionSabotageBro codeWoman-fixatedAuraGravitateChoosing signalsLooks maxingOrbitingCockblockLevel upMental shiftSalesmen
Test your understanding
- What are the key differences between a "select man" and a man who merely "fakes being select" through peacocking?
- How do women typically signal their interest in a man, and what are common mistakes men make in interpreting these signals?
- Why is the "bro code" often abandoned when men are competing for female attention, and what behaviors result from this?
- What is the significance of the "mental shift" required for men who are becoming more desirable, and what challenges might they face?
- How does the "looks maxing" community's focus on male-to-male validation differ from genuine attraction dynamics between men and women?